


I Was Promised a Sun

by lobstronamous



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Action/Adventure, Character Death, F/M, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Romance, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-16
Updated: 2013-08-01
Packaged: 2017-12-15 03:41:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/844892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lobstronamous/pseuds/lobstronamous
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After loosing someone close to her heart, Evalyn Lewis is broken and very much not herself. She's on a dangerous path, seeking justice for the lost soul. Along the way she meets some interesting characters who are just as unsure of her as she is with them. Two teams eventually become one and Eva can't help but wonder.. If time really does heal all wounds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I own whatever you don't recognize!

"I'm so tired.."

The words fell from my lips in a great, exhausted and almost defeated sigh. The long, dirty nails of my fingertips grazing along the long stretch of boring white wall, letting my digits dance over the slick and now barren tables that rested up against it. My tired eyes lingering on ugly, abstract paintings and the scattered, professional photographs of a young woman dressed to the nines. Old boots trudged through the mess that littered the floor with carelessness. Crunching glass beneath every step and kicking tiny objects across the hall.

"So tired of playing your fucking game," I spat as my sheathed foot took a swing at an empty vase sitting just at the entrance of the kitchen, sending large chunks soaring through the air, sliding across the clean, checkered tile as they landed. My palms began to sweat as fists clenched tighter and tighter before a quick release, only to return to the fist seconds later.

Falling against the wall, I allowed my eyes to slip shut. Trying to contain the fire that was rapidly building under my skin with every passing moment of silence.  
"Give it up, sweetheart," I called out into the darkness. "The longer you run, the longer you have to suffer." The venom that fell with every word was still so alien to me. My body would freeze for just a shred of time, along with my heart while my brain went haywire as I tried to decipher this new voice. This new being. But as quickly as I would shut down, I would start back up as I realized there was no new presence. There was only my shell, filled to the brim with hatred as I stalked the halls of this beautiful and now slightly broken home.

"Hey!"A voice cried out from the distance.

The snap in my neck was disgustingly audible as my attention was brought to the floor above me. Soon after, a struggle could be heard as bodies fell to the floor with a loud thud, bringing a sick smile to my cracked lips.  
Turning on my heels, the shattered glass grinded into the wooden floor before being kicked back as I made my way towards the carpeted stairs near the front entrance. The railing serving as a drum as the long, dagger tapped against it in an unorganized rhythm until I had reached the last step. At the end of the hall a door swayed, revealing a fresh dent in the once oh so perfectly painted wall, showing signs of great force.

"Leah?"I called out. Feeling a slight wave of panic rise within me when she didn't respond immediately. But when she had, it was a mere grunt and furious banging on the floorboards as feet kicked.

With quick steps, I moved towards the door, pushing it back to rest against the abused wall behind it. There was a short lived gasp of excitement over the sight that lay before me. Hair that was once pulled tightly into a bun had been torn loose. The now dark, mangled locks acted as a curtain to hide the certain scowl of my companions face. Beneath her, a bruised and battered woman. Her lightly freckled face stained with running make up and dark chocolate eyes filled with such hopelessness as she caught sight of me. Now aware that the possibility of her second escape was now nearly impossible, she began to thrash about and scream at the top of her lungs, which was cut short as Leah delivered her a quick smack across the face.

"I knew you'd catch her!" I expressed happily, taking slow steps around the couple in the center of the room. Thanking and congratulating her on a job well done, like I always did . She muttered out a "Thanks," as the young girl continued to fight against the weight of her captor.  
"She's a lot more feisty than I thought." Without releasing her hold on the victim, she looked up to me, her hair still blanketing her face. But not enough to hide the dark, shiny substance that adorned the side of her face.

"Leah!" Squatting down to her level, I brushed the hair away to examine the cut on her cheekbone. With a scowl now on my face, I looked down to meet the girls puppy like eyes and spat, "Well that doesn't help your case at all." Her eyes squeezed shut, forcing more tears to spill from the corners as she quietly prayed for some sort of miracle to shine down on her. I almost laughed at this pitiful sight and her cry for help from someone who wasn't even there. But that would take away the last shred of humanity within me, and I wished to hold onto at least some of whatever was left. So I held my palm over my mouth, pulling down on the flesh to keep that smile at bay. The smile of a monster within me. The monster that she and her friends had unknowingly created.

When the girl had finished with her prayer, she turned to me. "Please," Her beg was softer than a whisper. And that word.. That one word had triggered something inside of me. Like the moment before I had taken my last prisoner, I felt the hatred rise like bile in my throat.

"Move," I growled. Leah quickly obliged, giving blondie a split second of freedom, which she spent thrashing about as she tried to crawl away. Her arms were pinned down by my knees, vision once again blocked by a mass of hair that spilled over her face. The weapon I had kept at my side this entire time, now resting against my teeth. Lightly picking at every curve and crevasse as I pondered over how to use it first.

"What was that?"

Her form was trembling now as she tried to choke out the plea again. "You don't have to do this."

I huffed with yet another grin forming. "Oh.. But yes-I-do!" I shouted as the knife was pulled from my teeth and brought down right next to her pretty face, cutting off quite a large chunk of hair.

Before she had time to register what was happening, I had removed myself from her, gripping the collar of her shirt and pulling her up to her feet. In the blink of an eye, her back had collided the wall violently. Shaking it so much that her mirror had fallen and shattered at her feet.

"It seems that you've seen one too many movies, Princess. In real life, it's an eye for an eye. And in this case..a life for a life." Her once sleepy and red eyes widened at that. I could practically see the night play out in her misty eyes. "Oh.. It's finally clicked in your tiny little brain, has it?" "Please, I'm so-" Her body was plucked from the surface for just a spare moment before meeting it with a much more force. Her cry ignored as I pressed my elbow into her throat.

"I wonder.. I wonder how many times she begged for her life? I wonder, at what point, did you realize that you had made your date with death? Was it the moment you watched her bleed out? Or was it when we came knocking on your door?"

Her attention had slowly drifted beyond me. Falling on the other side of the room where her collection of porcelain dolls sat in peace. Forever collecting dust. She seemed more so calm now. Like she had begun to accept the consequences of her past actions. Though there were still those few moments where she would blubber, before taking a deep breath to recollect herself.

"I'm sorry-" "Don't you apologize to me!" With a quick motion, her body had been flung back to the floor. She didn't even try to stand or to crawl away this time. Instead she desperately wiped her stained cheeks with the sleeve of her sweater. "Apologize to her!" "What I did was wrong!" She tried to argue. "I should have done something.." "But you didn't!" Lowering myself over her, I grabbed a fistful of her hair and forced her to meet my gaze. "You're only regretting it because you got caught." "No! I promise I-"

"Enough!" Leah roared from the doorway, where she stood tall with her arms crossed and a foot tapping. "We don't have all night, Eva. We've been fooling around for too long. Let's finish this and get back to the damn house."

With a sigh, my face fell and my grip on the girl loosened, though I did not remove the weight from her form. "Every time I try to have some fun-" "I know, I'm a party pooper," She teased with the tiniest of smiles. "But we really do have to leave soon." "Oh, fine," I groaned in reply.

"Wish I could say that I was sorry, Alexis. But this is what you have reduced me to." Reaching just past her, I ripped the knife from its place within the floor, watching as her eyes slipped shut, waiting for the blade to pass through her flesh.

The weapon glided lightly over her. Slipping in between her shoulder blades before coming to a point as it rested at the base of her back, pressing down just enough to get a reaction out of her. Which was a small whimper as her body jolted forward to try and escape the puncture.  
The knife was quickly pulled away and placed back in its sheath before being slipped into my pocket.

"We've already made a pretty big mess."

Releasing the cluster of hair, both hands moved to either side of her head and...in one swift motion, it was over. Her body fell limp as my hands recoiled. Fingers stretching and wiggling in the open air, trying to shake the disgusting feeling of death from my being. But I was stained. No amount of boiling hot water and soap could clean this stench from my hands.

"Finally," my partner exhaled. Like she had been holding her breath in anticipation this entire time. "I'll start cleaning up the downstairs. Meet me there in ten?" I acknowledge her request with a silent nod. My attention not moving from the still girl that lay beneath me for even a second.  
Leah's ratted converses squeaked as she turned on her heel, her steps growing softer and softer the further she got. Leaving me in peace with my second victim.

Lifting myself from her, I sat off to the side, digging my fingers into her hip as I pulled her over to lay on her back. Her half lidded eyes now empty as they looked up at the ceiling.

Reaching out, I began to brush away strands of hair that stuck to her face with the softest of touches, smiling sadly. "She was going to have a big sleepover, yannow.. For her nineteenth. I was going to give her the house for the night. Let her do whatever she wanted and have all of her friends over.. And you know what? You would have been the first to receive an invite." With my bottom lip slipping in between my teeth, I managed to pull my attention away from the corpse. Staring down at my feet as I slowly rose from the floor, taking a simple step over her still form and moving for the empty doorway.

"I hope you got to enjoy what her life paid for."


	2. Role Model

"2:45" the clock read.

The thin, silver hands jerking every so slightly with every passing second. Slowly dancing over the ever so fluffy face of a Siamese cat resting in the center of said clock, surrounded by a pink canvas, forever appearing unamused by the prison she would spend a lifetime in. Her icy grey eyes piercing through you as she stared you down. It didn't matter where you sat in the room, she always seemed to find you. Her ultimate goal was to make you shift in your seat as you sat in peace. Uncomfortable at the thought of always being watched, until you had given in, returning the space to her in silence. Having had this interesting object in my possession for over three years now, I had since grown immune. I would occasionally make eye contact, smiling at the fancy text beneath her brown paws, "Who fucking cares." and nod in approval of her attitude, rather than meeting her gaze and simply fading away. But these days, she was simply part of my life. Rarely acknowledged unless someone had brought her up, forcing me to tell her very short story and how she came into my life.

Today was different. Much, much different. Instead of shoving her to the side, she served as my only company as I stared down at my half empty mug of coffee. The dark blue rim now smudged with red lipstick and the dried, brown liquid that spilled into my mouth every other minute. With fingers tapping against the thick object, my attention moved about. Leg bouncing with anticipation, shaking the stool beneath my form causing me to sway lightly.

I admired the decorations that adorned this section of my home. Some old, some new. Some not even my idea, though letting them slide in order to bring a smile to a certain someone's face.

Steel butterflies of various sizes flying in a pattern over the wall, silly signs and posters my mother had bought for me that I had sworn to myself I would never use in my own house. Just above the empty threats etched into wood and the amusing quotes inked onto paper, rested a cluttered nook. Shot glasses of different heights and many colors sat beside a short line-up of black "Pimp Cups", all empty and collecting dust. Safe for two Cups that had been used just the other night to drown much sorrow. Right in the center of these glasses, Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Yoda, Obi-Wan Kenobi and a tiny Jawa all in Bobble Head form. You could say I had a very small obsession with collecting these nerdy objects. And I was oh so proud of them.

"I did the right thing," I stated with a sigh. The hot breath tickling the delicate skin of my lips. "I did.. Didn't I? I mean, it's not forever. I just need some time. Just a little break to sort my shit out." Eyes falling down to the coffee, I frowned at my small reflection. So tired and beat down by life's busy schedule. "I just need some time.." The cup was raised and brought to my lips, delivering the lukewarm caffeine to my already jittery body. As I swallowed, I met the cold gaze of my only friend just across from me and with brows furrowed, I lowered the mug back to the table. Revealing my mirrored expression as we stared one another down for a few silent moments. My knee still rising and falling in rapid fire.

"You know, BomBom.. You are terrible company."

In the distance, a faint clicking as the lock on the front door was fiddled with. Seconds after, a light from then outside world entered my home, along with a tall shadow as the new presence stood in the doorway. "I'm home! Oh, and I smell coffee," The girl sang happily. Her shoes smacking against the wooden floor after she had closed the door. Eager to get a taste of what should have been made hours ago, before either of us had left the house.

Our eyes met the instant she had rounded the corner. Her cheeks flushed from the chilled winds and once neatly braided hair tousled and undone. Her rosy, cracked lips stretched into a smile as she gave me a look-over. "Well you look cute!" "Wish I could say the same," I teased. Her expression immediately fading into shock as she gasped loudly. "I'm kidding! You look...decent." The smile returned, though just barely as she scoffed and moved towards the pot of coffee. Giving me a playful shove as she went. "Dick," she mumbled. Her backpack quickly dropping from her shoulder before being placed on the island, where it would remain for the next two days until she returned to her personal hell.

"Did Mr. Wheeler like that paper of yours?" At that, the cupboard door was slammed shut and her cup placed down unnecessarily rough. "Uh oh," I chuckled in her expense. "He fucking hates me!" "He doesn't hate you, Tyler." "He does!" Filling her cup to the brim, she returned the large pot to the machine and moved to sit across from me. Popping the cap to a tall bottle of White Chocolate Caramel Creamer, and practically dumping it into her drink.

"You read it, right?" I nodded. "It was good, right?" "It was better than good." "Thank you! Now tell him that!" Closing the lid, she pushed it off to the side and took a large swig of the sweet caffeine, sighing in relief as she felt it warm her body.

"I honestly don't think he even reads our work-my work.." "Well, we'll just have to buy some big flashing lights for every paper you turn in. Won't we?" She smiled at that. Her fingers aimlessly fiddling with one another as she stared down at the mug in silence, before lifting her head. Replacing her darkened, hateful eyes with her usual sparkling diamonds. "What about you? Any college gossip?" The overly active leg had suddenly stopped bouncing. My hold on the drink now just a little tighter as I stared off into space.

This was the moment I had been dreading. The moment where I told my baby sister that I just couldn't cut it. Show her that I was too weak to juggle all of my priorities, letting her look up to a failure. Maybe I could weasel my way out of it? Save it for a rainy day.

"Well," I started up. My spine straightening as I awkwardly flipped hair from my face. "William got some girl knocked up." "What a surprise." She stated with a blank expression. " Uh.. I got hit on by a lesbian." Then, she was intrigued. Leaning forward, she placed her elbows on the counter and rested her chin in her palms.

"Do tell!" "I-I-well.. I didn't have enough change for the vending machine and she just swoops in with her money and buys me a ton of snacks-" "Sounds like flirting, alright." She mused. Clearly unimpressed by my story. "She winked at me and touched my butt as she left." Slapping a hand over her mouth, she did her best to muffle the laughter that so desperately wanted to escape. "I hope you didn't pass that up! Man or woman, you need to get la-" She was cut short, still chuckling as she caught sight of my wide eyes and mouth hung agape. "Tyler!" "What? Don't act like it isn't true." "Can my love life not come up as a topic for the rest of our lives, please?" I muttered. "And besides, its- "

Here we go.

"Even if I were interested-"

Come on. It's three simple words. Much easier than the other oh so popular three worded statement. It shouldn't be this hard to say.

"It wouldn't really matter," I sighed out.

Her brow cocked. The smile fading quickly as she slouched, now sensing the atmosphere had changed completely. "Oh?" "I more than likely won't be seeing William again. Or My Lesbian because I-" A big breath was taken, eyes slipping shut as the words fell out in the exhale. "I left college."

It took her a moment, like I knew it would as she struggled to register the statement. "Left? Like-" "Like dropped out." Her eyes widened at that. Silence swarming around us like insects. I hated it more than waiting all damn day to drop the bomb.

I watched her carefully as she straightened, her attention moving to watch the ripples in her coffee as she breathed down on it softly. Her pink lips tugging into a crooked smile as she let out a short chuckle. "You're laughing," I stated, dumbfounded. "Why are you laughing?" She met my gaze, her smile growing wider. "Oh, I'm just picturing the day you tell mom and dad." Her expression was mirrored on my own face as she struggled to finish her drink. "So.. You're not mad? Disappointed?" The almost empty cup as placed down, her brows now furrowed as she looked to me. "No? Were you expecting me to be?" "Well, it's just-I'm supposed to be the role model and-" She held up a slender hand. Her palms slightly stained with ink, possibly from a paper she rushed through earlier in the day. "I am in no way shape or form disappointed in you. The only time I'll ever judge you is if you get into hard drugs and start killing baby animals." I frowned at the thought. My stomach doing flips, churning up what little food I had violently, making me feel nauseous for just a moment.

"Well that's never going to happen, so-" The squeak of her chair silenced me as she pushed away from the table. Lifting herself up, she walked my way with a smile plastered on her youthful face as she wrapped her arms around my shoulders. "You're my big sister, Evalyn. I'll love you forever." Removing my vice grip on the mug, my arms snaked around her waist as I pulled her close. Receiving a kiss to my mess of hair. "I love you too, kiddo."

She gave me one long, painful squeeze before loosening her hold, but not fully letting go. "Does this mean I get to go tonight?" Frowning, I looked up to her. "Go where?" Her mouth hung open in shock as she finally peeled herself away. "You forgot!"

Puzzled, my expression remained blank as I watched the now moody teenager lightly stomp over to her side of the island. "Well yeah! I've kind of been trying to avoid multiple panic attacks over this whole college thing for the past two weeks!" "The party," She stated dully just before finishing off her coffee. "Oh.." Was all that fell from my lips. Still genuinely confused over what the hell she was talking about, which only raised more disappointment. Until I had finally remembered last weekend, she had come to me asking if she could go to some silly get together. "Oh! Uhm, that one girls party-" "Alexis," She replied with an eye roll and sigh. "Right! The girl you've been friends with for months. Yet somehow I have not met and judged her yet?" "I told you, she doesn't do well in those situations. They really freak her out." "Oh well!" "I thought you said you wouldn't do this, hm? Turn into mom?"

I scoffed, mildly offended by such words. "I let you get away with so much shit she never would allow! This is normal guardian stuff!" "Okay, okay!" Her hands were thrown up in surrender, empty cup in hand as she backed away until she reached the sink. "I'll talk to her tonight, okay? ..That is, if you let me go?" Her eyes widened and her thin lips formed a sad pout. Daring me to say 'no'.

With an exaggerated groan, I bitterly gave in. Chuckling dryly as she threw her fists up into the air in victory. "Maybe you could help me find something to wear?" "..Wear what you've got on?" Her eyes quickly moved down. Tugging at her loose, black shirt hidden beneath a denim jacket and a hoodie. She looked back to me, scowling in disgust. "No. I want to look..you know, nice." "Oh, so there are going to be boys there," I stated matter-of-factly as I removed myself from my seat, moving towards the sink as I too placed my cup just beside hers at the bottom.

"I didn't say anything abou-" "Hey, I may not be a teenager anymore, but I'm still a woman. I get it. When is this party?" "Well, the party doesn't start until like, eight. But she wanted me to come over early for some girl time, I guess." "Well then," placing my hands on her shoulders, I spun her around and began to push her towards the stairs. "let's not waste any time! There are boys to impress!"

While Tyler hastily showered, trying to remove any and all essence of school, I had rummaged through her closet. Picking out a few items I liked and piecing them together to make a whole outfit. Each option laid out over her terribly messy bed, welcoming her as she rushed in with a towel wrapped around her slender frame.

After drying herself and pulling her still long, damp hair up into a messy bun, she put on a half assed fashion show. Judging my tastes in silence as I hooted and hollered. Proudly tooting my own horn.

"Don't give me that look," I warned as I caught her glare in the full length mirror. "You asked for my help, I'm giving it to you. Besides, they're your clothes. You wear this shit." With a small chuckle and a shake of her heard, she removed the long, white button up and black leggings and tossed them into the corner with the other denied outfits. Which would more than likely be left unattended to until I gave her hell for it. Two outfits later, we had finally settled and come to an agreement on a velvet, red dress and a leather jacket to protect her bare shoulders.

With her sat at the vanity, I dried and brushed her soft wavy hair while she looked over all of her make up choices. Pulling her hair to rest over one shoulder, I pinned and sprayed it into place, hammering her with questions.

"What happens when you start feeling uneasy or unsure of something?" "I don't do it." Another pin. "When a stranger offers you a drink-" "I don't take it. Same deal when someone tries to lure me into their van with candy," she replied with a soft laugh, applying a clear gloss to her lips before slipping it into the pocket of her jacket. "When a guy doesn't have a condom?" Her pale face flushed, which was quickly hidden as she rested her forehead in her palm. "He doesn't get _it_ in."

Mom would kill me if she were here to witness this. If she ever got wind that I wasn't laying the hammer down on this kid about sex, she would quite honestly lose her shit and slap a Chastity Belt on the poor girl. I didn't care who Tyler slept with and how many times. As long as he was trustworthy and they were both incredibly safe about it.

"'atta kid! What happens when dumb-asses go down the dark alley? Or into an underground club?" She smirked as my hands rested on her shoulders, looking over her appearance in the oval mirror. "They die." Placing one hand to my heart, I let a sigh of relief and faked proud tears. "I've raised you so well. Alright, let's get you on the road!" Clapping my hands together excitedly, for a moment, I almost believed I was the one going out and not her.

She grabbed her small tote bag, slung it over her shoulder and followed me down the stairs, stopping on the last step to put on her boots. "And you're going to text me, right? Not every hour but, you know.. When you think about it." She stood tall, smiling up at me. Her eyes shimmering as the light from the setting sun danced through the window just above the front door. "I will." Giving her a quick hug, I watched her exit our home and easily glide into her car. As she turned the key, the car was immediately filled with a monstrous boom as some song played.

Her eyes widened in shock as she frantically tried to lower the volume. As the furious beats died down, we shared a look through the dirty glass. Chuckling softly at her own embarrassment. And with a wave goodbye, she had left me once again in the silence.


	3. Angel

The afternoon was peaceful. Despite the numerous toddlers running amuck, falling and scraping their knees and then proceeding to wail as if their most prized possession had been thrown down into the sewers. Never to be seen or heard of again. Or to even be thought about after this very day. They'll wake up tomorrow and forget the pain of watching their favorite Barbie or action figure slip out of their tiny fingers. Only to be remembered years later, when they grew out of their toy phase and passed some old pictures, seeing the item in their once small death grip. "Oh, I remember that!" they'll say with a smile before simply flipping to the next page. Completely unphased.

Their parents would run to their spawn, collecting them into their arms as they hushed and rocked them from side to side in hopes to ease the hurt. Or simply felt that shouting at the young boy or girl, was the best way to go about a stressful day. Resulting in either more tears of sadness, or the shrieks of a temper tantrum.

I watched one in particular stomp around like he was a big shot. His brilliant blue eyes hidden under blond, soft, shaggy curls. The faintest of freckles dancing across the bridge of his nose and his cheeks slightly pink as he huffed. I never really cared for kids. Not that I didn't like them-okay to an extent, I didn't. I just could never picture myself sitting at home with a crying, screaming, pooping bundle in my arms that always managed to empty my wallet and sanity. I didn't have the patience, or anger management classes in order to handle such a life style. But if I were to have a child, I would want this boy. He was beautiful and had quite the personality that kept my attention.

He would pick a few weeds nearby from the Earth, trot over to his mother and lay them in her lap before running off to collect more. And while he did his running about, his Transformer toy hung from his mouth. Baby teeth holding it by its limb, chewing on it even though his mother tried multiple times to remove it.

At one point, as he sat and punched the soft sand surrounding the playground, we had met each other's gaze. He seemed dumbfounded at first, until I shared a small smile which he happily responded by giggling shyly and hiding his face. He would peek out from behind his dirty hands before quickly covering his eyes again once he realized I had not backed down. But a sharp clank had pulled my attention away from my new friend.

Now staring down at a red and black checkered board, I analyzed the placement of every game piece very intently.

"Oh come on!" I cried out in distress as I found a cluster of red plastic surrounding my last three pieces, leaving only a few spots open. Though each one a possible trap. "This is some bullshit!" Tyler did nothing but sway from side to side in pure bliss. She had won, unofficially. Like any other time we played Checkers. "I'm never letting you pick the games again."

Leaning forward, I studied the war zone. My hand reaching for a piece before quickly retracting. Unsure and terrified. When I had found my next action, I rather confidently moved in. Swiping the piece up and moving it over hers. Taking her piece and adding it to my very small collection off to the side. But almost instantly after my move, she had taken another one of my disks. Leaving me with two. There was no way I could come back from this.

Dipping my fingers under the thin board, I flipped it over. The pieces soaring up into the air and landing around us in a scattered mess. "Fuck this!"

She tried to calm me down between her chuckles. But to no avail. I continued to mutter, bitch and brag about how I truly shined when it came to games that required physical stress. Like Football, Capture The Flag and all of that other shit I was forced to be a part of in school.

"Yeah but," she cocked a brow, gesturing down at the now empty board. "checkers." "Shut up," I replied bitterly as I removed the flap of my large bag, pulling out two grilled cheese sandwiches, purposely throwing one at her head. She squealed, throwing her hands up and swatting the snack to the side. "Don't be a sore loser." "I will do whatever I want," I replied in a snooty tone as I hastily unwrapped the lukewarm bread, ripping a large chunk of it away with my teeth.

She shook her head, still smiling as she slowly peeled away the plastic wrap. "Remember our first picnic? No mom or dad around."

With an eye roll, I went down memory lane. Groaning as I remembered how difficult it was. At ten years old, I had decided that me and my sister, who was five at the time, didn't need adult supervision. I thought being a grown up would be easy, so I took it upon myself to make our snacks and prepare a basket. That, without a doubt, was the easy part. Handling my heathen sibling and the swarm of insects was not. She carelessly left her food out, allowing the ants to pile onto our blanket. And when she decided to go for a walk, she had dropped her ham sandwich into the dirt, but that didn't stop her from eating it. And when she found me to be too bossy, she would seek revenge by smearing pudding over my shirt. Resulting in a food fight that our mother wasn't too thrilled with.

"I'd like to think we've gotten better."

Scoffing, I continued to stuff the cheesy bread into my mouth, mumbling "You're still a little bastard when you want to be." "Back at ya." "How about the first time you tried to cook?" Her face flushed with embarrassment, quickly hiding it from my view. "So I can't cook for shit. Big deal. I always preferred Microwaved meals better." Leaning back, hoisted up by one hand, I replied "Good! Because I'm tired of slaving over a hot stove without so much as a 'Thank you'," I teased. Her eyes narrowed into a glare, her mouth hung open, appalled. "Ha!"

Finishing off my sandwich, I allowed my greasy hand to fall back, taking some weight off of the other as I looked up to the sky. Today, was truly a beautiful day. I hadn't been able to enjoy previous days like this one. I was so caught up in a job that I didn't necessarily adore and classes that I felt obligated to take. There had been a huge weight lifted from my shoulders after confessing that I had went against my parents' wishes and left college. That was the life they wanted for me, but it wasn't something I wanted for myself.

"You know I love you, right?"

Frowning, I pulled my head back up, looking to Tyler who was staring intently at her tattered boots. Her long fingers twirling the old strings aimlessly.

Opening my mouth to respond, she unknowingly cut me off. "All of those terrible things I said growing up.. I never meant them. Any of them." "We were just kids, Tyler- " "And I appreciate this. All of this. Everything you've given and done for me. Playing hide & Seek with me when you had better things to do. Singing me to sleep."

A lazy smiled graced my features as I remembered those nights. Every so often, she would wake from a nightmare, immediately bounding into my room and throwing herself into my arms, choking on her cries until I lulled her into sleep. She had since grown out of that habit, though.

"Giving me a home when I wanted to get away. Waking up early and taking me to school on your days off, which should have been spent sleeping in." She finally looked to me, her nose slightly red and her eyes glossy. "I could never thank you enough."

Now concerned, I sat up, scooting just a tad bit closer. "Tyler, what's going on?" She ignored my question, her lip trembling as she repeated herself, "I love you." "I-I love you too, Tyler." She nodded in acknowledgement, checking her shoes one last time before returning her gaze to me. Tears had fallen. One by one, they spilled over and she slowly began to lose control of herself.

"I'm sorry." "Ty-" "I'm so sorry." "What could you possibly be sorry for?" Her lips twitched as they formed a crooked smile, though she was clearly still heartbroken. She struggled to find the words to say. Her mouth opening and closing with nothing but soft gasps passing by, until she found there was only one thing to say. She continued to apologize in rapid fire. Her sadness growing more and more until I felt the need to cry along with her, though I had no idea what we would be so sad for.

"I didn't mean for this to happen. Please-please forgive me. I'm so sorry."

I woke with a start. The light of the morning blinding me, making it much more difficult to find my phone which was currently going haywire as my alarm went off.

Fumbling with the device, I managed to turn it off before making an attempt at placing it back on the coffee table. It only just reached the edge, and when I released my hold, it fell onto the carpet. Shrugging it off, I rolled onto my back and gave a great stretch before immediately recoiling with a hiss. I had fallen asleep on the couch during the movie last night, which was never a good idea. It was nearly impossible for my neck to turn to either side, my entire back aching.

When I had swung my body to the edge, slowly standing up, my body cracked. In just one night I had gone from an energetic twenty-three year old to a sixty year old lady, grunts included.

With half lidded eyes I slowly shuffled towards the kitchen, immediately sinking into my morning routine. The first thing on the list was to acquire the fresh batch of coffee the machine had been set to make just thirty minutes ago. It was just warm enough to bring about a sigh of bliss as it coated my dry throat.

Leaning against the counter, I continued to enjoy my drink in silence. Other than the soft, persistent ticking as usual. But something had caught my eye, or lack of something, I should say. Just to the side of the front door, ahead of me, a pile of shoes of various styles. Some old and ratted, others new, shiny and ready to impress. Among the clutter, a lack of familiar dull brown boots.

Frowning, I moved swiftly towards the door and up the stairs, calling out my sister's name. When she didn't reply, I had practically thrown her door open. Half expecting and hoping to see her laying face down, still dressed in yesterdays clothes with a hangover she'd kick herself for later. But I found nothing. The room remained untouched since the moment she left last night.

With fake and fairly forced optimism, I returned to the living room downstairs. Head held high and shoulders thrown back as I calmly walked to the low table, snatching my phone from beneath it. My fingers moved with haste as I searched for any missed calls or texts from my M.I.A sibling. The only thing I had missed was a call from work. Most likely William asking me to work a few extra hours at the shop tonight. Which I would agree to, but not before groaning obnoxiously and stomping my feet.

Closing my phone, I pressed it to my lips, sighing.

She forgot. She simply forgot to call me. I used to be the exact same way. For the most part, I was pretty good at letting my mother and father know what was happening and where I was. But there were times when I would be so caught up in the moment, the task would slip my mind. Only to be scolded when I returned home. And oh, how I would scold her. I may be the carefree, fun, understanding sister, but this was one thing I was strict on. My mind and body could not handle the stress of not knowing where she was or how she was doing, when it was my responsibility to know. Moments like these, made me wish I could go back and be a better daughter and lift the weight from my mom's shoulders.

Shaking it off, I straightened myself again. Taking a deep breath before slipping the small device into my pocket, I began my very small walk back to the kitchen. Where I would sit and wait as I wrote down all of the possible punishments she would have to undergo. Cleaning the bathrooms was the first idea that came to mind, making me smile. I didn't particularly hate cleaning any specific thing, even the toilet. I surprisingly didn't mind it. But Tyler loathed it, settling her chore for the next however long I felt necessary

Three thunderous knocks had caused me to jump ever so slightly. My free hand immediately slapping against my chest, feeling my heart racing dangerously fast. I slowly turned to the door, desperately trying to calm my rattled nerves.

The knocks repeated themselves when I hadn't answered their demands fast enough. "Coming!" I called out. Placing my mug on the nearest surface before hastily moving to the door, slowly pulling it open.

Standing on my porch were two men. One balding and short, his salt and peppered beard concealing the lower half of his face. He was dressed in a light olive, pinstriped suit. The jacket undone, revealing the baby blue button up underneath and a navy tie with the most obscure pattern dancing across the fabric. His partner, much taller and much younger had dressed it down just slightly. Black slacks and a boring, white dress shirt with his coat hung over one arm. His jaw was strong, much like his stare even when he cracked a pitiful smile.

"Evalyn Lewis?" The older one question.

"Yes. C-can I help you?" "I'm Officer Rollins-" My heart began to race once again, though this time, much faster. "This," he gestured towards the young male "is Lieutenant Finley. Would you mind if we..came in for a moment?"

Swallowing hard, I took a short step back, allowing them to enter my home before I shut the door with trembling hands. My body turned to face them, but my gaze just couldn't manage to settle. It was jumping around the room, desperately trying to avoid the guests as I stumbled over my words.

"W-would you-uh.. Would you like-" Rollins interrupted me with a soft smile, "No thank you, Ms. Smith. Our stay will be short. Would you uh-" hesitantly, he gestured to the empty chair "please have a seat?" Nodding silently, I quickly took my seat as he sat just next to me in the long couch I had used for the night, while his partner aimlessly moved about. Kicking his shiny shoes into the carpet, catching a few glimpses of what little family portraits I had scattered around the room.

Keeping my eyes on the wandering man, I questioned "What's this all about?"

Rollins shared a shaky smile, his eyes moving between me and the floor every few seconds. "Your sister-" he paused. His lips sealing shut once again as he looked to the corner of the room. Completely unaware that my nails were now digging into my flesh. Breath halted in my chest, suffocating me and causing my form to tremble. "There was an incident-" "What kind of incident?" The question slithered its way past gritted teeth. Then and only then did his dark brown eyes finally settle on me, unmoving and filled with such sorrow. Sorrow that was soon passed onto me.

"I'm so sorry, Evalyn,"

My lower lip quivered, my vision now misty.

"Tyler was killed late last night."

Like a fist pounding into my stomach, the breath I had been holding was released as the body had shut down. My empty stare falling to the floor.

"I suggest you leave," I murmured barely above a whisper.

"Ms. Lewis," the Lieutenant spoke as he slowly made his way to me. "Leave!" I demanded in a far less friendly tone, causing him to jump back slightly. His partner stood, taking the mans arm and guiding him back to the front door, letting themselves out in silence. At the sound of their engine roaring to life, I stood on unsteady legs, slowly drifting towards the center of the room. I couldn't feel much of anything. Not the ache in my bones from an uncomfortable sleep or the beating of my heart as my shallow, shaky breath forced it back to life. All I could feel, was an unbearable coldness and the hot tears that I had only noticed when my vision was obscured.

Just across from me, in the other room, a stare I had seen too often. Her once hateful, grey orbs suddenly not seeming so hateful. If anything, she seemed to be suffering the same heartache as her gaze guided me to a black backpack resting on the island. The zipper pulled down, allowing the contents to spill out-various notebooks, pens, an Ipod and a folder filled with homework that needed tending to. The folder was decorated in silly, colorful graffiti and various names of friends who had decided to leave their mark.

Friends that would never see her bright and shining face again..

In a matter of seconds, I had lost myself as I was thrown down into a bottomless pit of overwhelming emotions. With a quick swipe I had pushed every framed picture and small candle from the top of the short entertainment center. The sound of their demise as they shattered only fueled my fire. I couldn't stop. Not a damn thing was saved from the hurricane as it swept through the main level of my home, which was destroyed in a matter of minutes. If it could break, it was broken. If it was small, yet heavy enough, it'd be thrown across the room, leaving a lovely dent in the walls that contained the storm. When there was nothing left, I had pressed myself as tightly as I could into the wall of my kitchen. My chest weighed down by an invisible force as I fought for air. I had grown dizzy during my rampage, causing me to simply slip into the corner, cowering away from the unseen darkness that I felt closing in around me.

My voice was now hoarse as I cried out her name, begging for her not to leave me, though she had left long ago. My pleas quickly turned into anger as I screamed and cursed any and every higher power for taking the only thing that held me together. Tyler was the final piece to keep the machine running, and with her gone, I was rendered useless.

Grabbing the nearest object I could find, I had chucked it upwards and as it collided with the ceiling, I had given my final message to the one who allowed this to happen. "Fuck you!"

Tyler was _my_ angel. Not theirs.


	4. Allan the Uniclops

There's nothing you can do to prepare for loss.

You tell yourself that everyone and everything has an end. Whether it be long and brutal, quick and painless, natural causes or the act of some cruel monster in the form of a human.

You watch your grandparents age. Their bodies slowly giving way and you know their time on Earth is nearly up, but you put on a bright smile and go about your life as if you've never noticed the gradual or not so gradual changes. Then they leave and it doesn't matter how, they just do.

You grow attached to your pets and watch them suffer the same fate and once you recover from the trauma, you hope the experience has built up some sort of shield to protect you from any future collisions, at least just a little bit. But it doesn't and nothing ever will save you from that kind of heartache. It's inevitable.

And the pain was just as fresh today as it was when Rollins arrived on my doorstep. But I hid it well, or so I liked to think.

The couple to my left, however, had fallen to pieces. Mainly the woman; my mother. Her sobs and sniffles could have drowned out the kind words of the priest, while my father could be heard whimpering when she would slip into silence.

I hadn't bothered to look their way, petrified of that ever so familiar feeling I had been suffering through all damn week; guilt. Their daughter had perished while under my care. They had trusted me with her life and I failed them. I didn't deserve their affection or to even be acknowledged. I so desperately wished that the ground beneath my aching feet would simply open up and swallow me whole. I couldn't bear the red and puffy eyes as they sent their silent and sometimes not so silent condolences. I didn't deserve their sad smiles or hugs filled with such pity.

With my failure, I have earned nothing but solitude as the self loathing ate me alive.

A slight weight had fallen into me, startling and drawing my attention to my left, where my father had placed a hand on my shoulder, squeezing it just slightly. The sight of their broken spirits had caused me to quickly turn away, staring at anything but them or the guests.

I watched the skies as tiny birds flew past and the colorful flowers dance when the wind swept on by. The light of the morning seeping in through the tall cluster of trees, adding quite a fairy tale feel to such a dark day. Which is why Tyler would rest here. A personal request made by her years ago, before she ever moved in. Mum had dropped her off for a weekend, which was spent shopping, going out to eat, watching silly movies and going on small adventures. During one of our adventures, we had discovered a cemetery-this cemetery. The long grass, trees and bushes all holding a steady, brilliant green. Not a shade of brown to be seen as the heat from the sun attempted to singe it. Marble stone pathways leading its visitors in various, confusing directions were lined with potted flowers. Beyond the flowers, a surprising number of headstones that still managed to shine despite their age.

"How could a place of so much beauty hold so much death?" she would say in astonishment during every single visit, as if it was her first time being there.

It took a lot of stress and arguments in order to get her here. My mother had wanted to take her back with her, to be buried near by so she could visit whenever she wanted. But I was relentless and fought for what Tyler wanted, and clearly won the fight.

Movement had pulled my attention forward, and with saddened eyes, I watched as the shining coffin was slowly lowered into the hole. I watched the object intently, not once blinking as I savored the final moments I had with her. But a flash of her cold, pale face had entered my mind. The first image that welcomed me when I had arrived, sick to my stomach at the sight of her opened casket for all to see.

The memory had scared me to the point where I had gasped in shock, quickly covering my mouth hung agape as I frantically turned away from the scene. My fathers hand falling limp to rest back on my mothers waist as I stormed away. My weak knees carrying me as far as they could until I had finally fallen against a tree, quite a distance away from the black suits and ties that hadn't bothered to stop me.

Not entirely confident in my ability to support my own weight, I had wrapped an arm around the thin base of the tree, grinding my temple into its harsh sides before giving it a quick smack with my cranium, biting on my lower lip as I tried to fight back the hundredth meltdown. But the mission was futile. A pitiful sob passing my swollen lips as tears stained my cheeks.

My screaming, racing thoughts had engulfed my being. I had tuned out the world that surrounded me, unable to detect a new presence until a soft hand had entered my blurry vision, tissue hanging loosely from between dainty fingers.

The first smile of the day had made itself known, though it was pathetic.

Taking the offering, I thanked the kind soul as I dried my tears before moving to clean my nose. "I've run out," I managed to mumble as I turned to face my company. Again, my mouth was left hung agape. However this time, it was a look of surprise, rather than horror.

The young girl that stood before me seemed to be around my age, though I appeared quite a few years older with the havoc my body had been forced to endure in short amount of time.

Her glossy lips pulled into a sad smile, her eyes filled with the same sorrow.

"I-I know you from somewhere, don't I?" She nodded. "I'm sorry, but-" a great, unattractive sniff filled the small empty space. "I'm not that great with names." "Leah."

As if struck by lightning, memories came flooding back in an instant.

Leah Lynn Ashford; the daughter of some family friends I had long since lost contact with.

Leah and I were never the best of friends. Never found ourselves gravitating towards one another, playing house or building forts. But when the neighbors gathered for parties, we stuck together. Discouraged by the lack of children around our age. We would walk about aimlessly, dodging the much taller humans as they paraded around with their glasses filled with various alcoholic drinks, which they promised was juice.

We did this for years. Never bonding over our likes or dislikes in games or television, but rather our opinions on life. It started out as simple things. We would judge the adults that surrounded us and question their behavior, but as we got older, we questioned our existence. Wondered what was waiting for us in the afterlife, or what we would be like in an alternate universe. In between these serious discussions, we would people watch and desperately attempt to decipher their dirtiest secret(s).

What little contact we had, had faded over time. Nearly vanishing completely when we got to High School, though we shared smiles as we passed in hallways. But that was all before we graduated and moved on with our lives. Yet here she was. Standing right in front of me in a teal, floral top and a black pencil skirt, looking very different from what memory she left me with.

"Wow," I breathed. Still taken aback by the sight of her. "It's been a very..long time."

Her smile brightened slightly at that, rocking on her heels. "Yeah, it has been.. Wish our reunion was under a lot better circumstances, though." I nodded in agreement, silent. Looking down at my hands as they tore the abused tissue to shreds. The tiny pieces being carried away by the wind.

I quickly slapped a forced smile over my features and straightened my spine, facing her again. Hoping the faked happiness would not only fix my mood, but the atmosphere. "What have you been up to since I last saw you?"

I wasn't necessarily sure that catching up with old friends at a funeral was the best idea. But I needed a distraction to keep me far away from Tyler until I was ready.

She shifted uncomfortably in place, her attention veering off as she made several attempts to speak. "I, uhm-" a hand reached to scratch the back of her neck "I own dad's shop now."

I looked to her with wide eyes, clearly not expecting her reply. I knew she loved the place just as much as her father, but never pictured her to be the type of person to own a store filled to the brim with weaponry of various kinds. "Wow.. How'd that happen?" "Mom got sick. She's sort of..confined to either her bed or a chair. Dad wanted to be there for her so he handed the responsibility down to me." I expressed my sympathy for her ill mother, who I could barely remember after all of these years.

Leah waved it off, showing me that I should change the subject as quickly as possible. "Do you enjoy it? The work?" "I know it's hard to believe, but.. I do. I really do. The people can be sketchy at times. But so far, nothing's happened and if it does I have a pistol on me at all times," she ended with a proud smile. "And a dangerous right hook. What about you? You practically fell off the face of the Earth."

Stifling a laugh, I shifted my weight to my other leg. My fingers twisting what was left of the torn apart tissue.

I proceeded to describe in as little detail as possible of what happened in my life once I left home and when finished, I encouraged her to be an open book. To tell me about herself, since I never really knew her before we had carelessly thrown ourselves down memory lane. Snickering behind our hands as we remembered the ugly dresses we were forced to wear, the obnoxious neighborhood drunk that always knew how to lighten up the Christmas parties, and how damn bitchy we were, even as children.

"I don't think that part has changed much," I mumbled with a fairly bright smile, though it faltered as I noticed Leah's attention was no longer on me, but rather on something in the distance. "Yeah, same here. Do you know that girl?"

With a brow cocked, I turned towards the street where a shimmering, cheery red Aston Martin sat in silence. The driver had long since exited the car, standing on the drivers side, peering over the hood. Her porcelain face hidden by a mass of curly, blond hair and thick, black sunglasses. Her pouty lips painted as red as her vehicle of choice.

Frowning, I squinted in hopes it would enhance my vision to get a better look at her. "No, I don't think so." "Wonder what she wants." "She's either just a bit too curious or watching groups of people mourn brings her some kind of fucked up satisfaction," I replied with a lame shrug. "Well, let's hope it's not the latter."

From what I could hear, the service had ended. The crowd was slowly, but surely dispersing. Their soft sniffles could be heard from various areas now, along with their shuffling as they either made way back to their cars or to another much smaller group to chat. But my eyes remained on this young girl, watching her intently as she swiftly placed herself back behind the wheel, driving away without having ever given me the slightest of glances.

My neck strained as I watched her go, only relaxing once she was completely out of my sight. "Weirdo," Leah spat. Nodding in agreement, I turned back to the now very empty space off in the distance, decorated in various kinds of flowers. I politely excused myself before slipping past my old and now new friend.

With every step, a weight had been added to my shoulders. The closer I got to the hole in the ground, the more difficult it became to walk. I was sure my ankles would roll and snap or my knees would buckle, sending me face first into the soft grass, but I managed to survive the journey unscathed. Taking a few deep, calming breaths the last bit of the way to brace myself for my final goodbye.

\- - - 

Like a sleepwalker, I found myself standing in a doorway with no memory of getting there.

The moment I stepped into my home, autopilot had kicked in, surrounding my wandering form with nothing but blurs until I had reached my destination.

I thought about turning away from the scene. To protect my heart from the countless photographs, stuffed animals of various types and the collection of necklaces that hung on the wall, having no more room in the jewelry box. But I wouldn't budge. I had frozen in place as my eyes scanned the filled, yet oh so empty room.

I so desperately wanted to hear her laughter as she read text messages from her friends or watched videos on her laptop. To see her laying on her stomach, ear buds in, feet wrapped around one another as they reached for the sky, swaying or bouncing with the music only she could hear as she did her homework. But this once loud, chaotic and cheerful house was now scary quiet, peaceful and gloomy. It was completely alien as well as unwelcome. This wasn't what I was raised around.

I couldn't recall a single day of my childhood that wasn't filled with constant noise. Even when I lived alone my house was normally filled with thunderous music and tv shows that had been left to run throughout the day.

With much hesitation, I moved into the room that I had only stepped into one other time this week. My mother had expressed the desire to have Tyler's room looking absolutely perfect.

"Why? Who's going to see it?" "Well I might!" So with an eye roll, I had given her what she wanted and went through my sister's room, organizing and cleaning every surface and corner until it looked as if it had never been lived in. Pausing here and there to bite back the tears whenever a particular memory ran through my mind.

I hated the sight, to be honest. Tyler wasn't exactly the cleanest person, but she wasn't the messiest, either. The only time her bed was ever made, was when she was forced to change the sheets. Clothes, shoes and books littered her floor. Apparently too lazy to simply slip them onto a shelf or into her closet. But she never left food, cups, bowls or plates behind to fill with bugs and managed to dust every inch of her room possible. Mainly because of her allergies.

She had a signature mess that I loved and cherished. And seeing this little box shining like brand new was unnerving.

Making my way to her bed, I carefully rested my weight upon the thick, white comforter. Smiling as a few toys had fallen into me. One toy in particular had practically laid its head in my lap. A once soft, white Unicorn that she had won at a carnival. The minute we spotted his cute little self hung up with a plethora of stuffed animals of many sizes we raced for the booth, throwing money at the man before chucking baseballs at the our targets. With how determined and competitive we were, one would think we were battling for the large and in charge teddy bear off in the corner. But no. We had our eyes set on the tiny little horse. And with a victorious fist pump into the air, I collected my prize but at some point handed it off to Tyler, who loved plushies more than any child I've ever met. Once in her arms he was immediately given the name Allan and as time went on, he lost his eye, thus deeming him Allan the Uniclops.

Holding him close to my chest like she had done so long ago, I collapsed into the pile of inanimate objects, causing most of them to fall to the floor with a cluster of soft thuds. My legs pulled themselves to rest against the back of my hands that stroked the synthetic hair of the toy.

"I'm not ready for this," I mumbled. "I'm not ready to be alone."

Turning Allan to face me, I brushed the coarse mane from his face. Nails gliding over his plastic eye, tapping it a few times before letting out a pathetic whimper, "I'm not ready to do this without you." It was as if this doll was Tyler herself, though much, much smaller and quieter.

Allan was pulled back into my suffocating embrace as my eyes slipped shut. The sleepless nights were finally catching up with me, coaxing my now lifeless body to the dark.

"What am I supposed to do?"

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy this <3 Reviews would be lovely and I will gladly review yours as well.


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